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Sanctification!

It IS God’s will that we all be sanctified.  He knows how many find it difficult to actually live out in today’s world.   I look at my children and see the temptations this world offers.  As a mother, I fear for their souls, their lives; all I can do is pray.  When all the talks, lectures, and scolding have come to their end, I am left with the power of prayer.  In my opinion, prayer is better and more powerful than all the talks, lectures, and scolding we give our children.

BUT prayer alone is not enough if you are a parent.  God will hold you accountable for what we say and don’t say to our children.  Even what we do or don’t do for them, to them.

Today, there is such an increase in the news stations bringing stories to public awareness in regards to sexual conduct both consented and in the form of abuse.  It makes my skin crawl.  Now with our nation allowing same sex marriages, we are seeing an increase of sex immortally in commercials, sitcoms, T.V. Shows, movies, and flat out in public site in restaurants, cafes, in public schools, and the list goes on.

All I can do is be available to my grown children (birth and step-children) in allowing them to ask questions. To pray God will send a christian who understands His ways and His plan for the people He created, if they are asking others about rights and wrongs.  BUT ultimately, it is God who calls us into a relationship with Him and He alone that shows us the way via the Word and His Spirit.  SO if he helped me to become who I am today, than I must trust God to do the same for my children and everyone.

This CHAPTER, CH 13, “Discerning Sexual Temptation” is a good section, though it was written several years ago, it hits on things going on today.  You should read it again if you already read it.  🙂  It begins with 1 Thessalonians 4:3, “For this is the will of God , your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality.”

I don’t know what the kids today are talking about with each other, I only know what they allow me to hear or what they share with me.  Mr. Franklin writes, “We are living in a society where young girls and boys are asked to become adults overnight. ……… to think that once they have sex, they will be ‘real’ men and women……”  I can’t say this is true here in my community.  The boys thoughts are my source of input.  My son and his friends.  A few boys have shared that it is the girls who seem to be curious about this kissing stuff.    One boy however seems to talk about his parents and what they watch in front of him.  I have caught him speaking in a degrading way about girls bodies, I naturally corrected him.  At first he laughed at me, rather chuckled, but anyway I gently explained how his behavior was rude and not pleasing to the Lord.  He acknowledged the wrong and seemed remorseful.  But, I couldn’t handle the influence he was having over my own son, so after a few more visits, I put a stop to their interaction, well out side of school that is.

About a month ago, my son shared that a 12 year old girl was having a baby with a 14 year old boy.  I asked him his thoughts.  He replied, “That is stupid.”  I asked him if he knew how it happened and why it was wrong. He replied, “Well yeah! mom.  It is wrong because they are not married.”  I agreed, but went on to express more reasons as to why it was wrong.  Like their age, etc.  He seemed to understand and stated, “Well they aren’t adults and can’t take care of it, guess their parents will.”  I said what happens if the parent’s can’t or wont’.  He innocently said, “They have to.”  I replied, “No, they don’t.  They could force the child into adoption which means this boy and girl couldn’t see the baby ever.  They may even force an abortion, which is death to this child.  I asked him his thoughts.  He said, “I am glad it is not me.” I smiled and thought, me too.  I began to ask if he and his friends think of such things.  He said, “No, it is the girls who do that.”  He added, “I do want a girlfriend, but I can wait.”  I said, “A girlfriend! You are to young for that.”  Than I asked what do girlfriends do?  He said, “They pass notes and say cool things about you.”   I changed the subject, and stated he needed not to think about it.

Honestly though, early this school year which would be fall 2014, a senior boy and a sophomore girl had a baby.  The baby is not to blame, but I felt is was wrong to shower this girl with all the goodies a married woman (would like but never gets) at a baby shower, baby clothes, baby furniture, baby stuff, etc.  I realize the people who did this was showing their love for the person not the action, and they were students in school not working adults who needed things for the baby.  I was afraid of the message it presented done in such a public manor or display.   Later when the little baby girl was born a huge portion of the community praised the birth and the couple who hadn’t married.  I think there was plans of marriage, not sure if it ever happened or not.  I kind of pulled away.  I was nice and friendly and pray for them.  I just can’t condone the action.  The baby who is innocent is not in my life, but if it were, I would show love towards her and would encourage marriage if they weren’t already.  They are a cute couple who has dated for a couple of years and seem to be in love.  But for one reason or another they shy ed away from our life and moved to a different church, one with more people with money.  I can forgive them and miss them.  The last season I remember them coming to our church was the winter of 2013.  That Christmas of 2013, I gave both families a gift the very next year we didn’t see them (both families).  The girl she came to church alone most of the time,  I believe I saw her father and sisters 2 in a 4 year span.  The boy however, came with his father and sisters quit frequently. Guess they felt the need to move, no one at the church knew of her pregnancy until the small town talk began.  Please hear what I am trying to say.  I think giving them stuff to help them was a good thing and a way to show God’s love for them, but could have happened more quietly to discourage other teens from doing the same.

After all in the bible we read where God will forgive us of our sins, but he doesn’t say he will spare us the consequence of it.

Anyway, now, today, in the spring of 2015, the SAME school year, another sophomore is having a baby, not sure the due date, not sure of any details as the above story.

All I know is today’s world is getting crazy in so many ways.  This chapter speaks of negative influences.  Well, how can we as parents protect ourselves from the media unless we decide to avoid the world, Hahaha, it is hard.  I watched a PG-13 movie the other day.  It was not rated for a thirteen year old as it stated.  The nudity scenes.  mind you it didn’t show everything a rated R shows, but it showed enough, that in my book was not for a thirteen year old.

Sexual morals is necessary for many reasons not to mention the aid in living a pure life.  There are to many people being hurt and families being turned upside down because of it.  I know this first hand.  My ex-husband leaving for another woman.  Another story for another day.

We just need to be honest and open with our children about all the downfalls of sex and explain how a good thing can be a bad choice.  Also, to know when this good thing can actually be a good choice.  What setting makes a good thing a bad choice or good choice.  I don’t mean we should go into explicit details about “sex”, but come on you can’t keep it a secret with today’s media chances are they already know about it.  My son knew, and I didn’t tell him about it.  I know his father didn’t tell him.

I do like that narrative given by Mr. Franklin, “You can measure the kind of Christian you are by the cost you’re willing to pay.”  I know he was not the first to say that, and I have heard others say that long before the book.  I will leave you now with that thought.

“What cost are you willing to pay as a Christian?”



et cetera